For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize