Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
