There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
