People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize
