Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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