Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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