my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
