WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
