Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize