I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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