Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Randomize
