guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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