i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
