was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
