do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
