She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
