I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Randomize
