That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
