just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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