you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
