But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
