the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
