She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Vodka?
Forever.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
