check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
My vagina just clenched in fear
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Randomize
