There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
