my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
