My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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