this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
