He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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