what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
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