Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize