if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Randomize
