We're facebook friends in real life
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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