last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
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