put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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