at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
