Can i not drive my cunt home
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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