you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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