i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
