butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
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