you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
