one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I am available for nakedness
Randomize