...so i touched it.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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