dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
