I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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