I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize