he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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