So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I love you. Go after that dick
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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