So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
