He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
